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GET INTO NATURE: SIT SPOT

June 26, 2022October 23, 2023 Jacqueline Buckingham

I want to introduce you to one of the foundational habits of nature connection – Sit Spot time.

What is Sit Spot and why is it important?

person sitting on rock at golden hour — Photo by Kasuma on Pexels.com

Habits are formed through repeated behaviour and our habits define our perception of the world, which is why we notice things that are important to us.

When you practice Sit Spot time regularly you will find yourself noticing things you never noticed before, and when you return home you will notice them there where you never noticed them before, because you have retuned your perception.

Sit Spot is a place in nature that you can visit regularly and get to know as your best friend. It is a place where you learn to sit still – alone, quietly and often. It will become your place of intimate connection with nature.

Over time get to know this place and allow this place to get to know you. When you become part of a place, quietly, regularly, the other animals that use that place get more comfortable with you there. Magic happens over time.

A Sit Spot doesn’t have to be in a beautiful wilderness setting. It can be in your garden or on a balcony; it can be in a local park or on your regular dog walk or jogging track. The most important thing to consider when finding a Sit Spot is that is easy to get to. Don’t look for the ‘perfect’ place. Look for the convenient place.

The intention is that you will go back to this place regularly, and making it easy to get to will support you in this.

HOW TO SET UP A GOOD SIT SPOT PRACTICE:

Have a timer with you, so that you can simply ‘be’ without the need to check your watch regularly. This will help you to really drop into a relaxed presence, without any mental distractions.

Take a notebook and pen with you so that, when you have finished your Sit Spot time, you can make brief notes or sketches that capture what happened at your Sit Spot. Bullet points or single words are enough.

In an ideal world you would sit at your Sit Spot for 20 minutes or more, because it takes 20 minutes for the animals that live in or use that place to get used to you being there. When you first arrive some of them will hide, and the birds may start alarm calling. After 20 minutes all of that activity will settle and life goes back to normal. If you don’t have 20 minutes, then try to spend at least ten minutes at your Sit Spot.

Here are a variety of ideas of how you can spend your time, depending how long you have…

SIT SPOT OPTIONS:

If you have 30 minutes available (or more!):

woman in purple sweater sitting on wooden floor with view of lake and mountains — Photo by Riccardo on Pexels.com

Once you have arrived at the place where you plan to do your Sit Spot, take a moment with your eyes closed. Silently in your mind greet the trees, plants and animals that are there. Then use ‘body radar’ to find a place to sit. Body radar is allowing your body to draw you towards a place to sit, rather than choosing with your mind.

Once you have found your Sit Spot place, become aware of your thoughts and let them simply drift by on your mind’s eye. Observe your breath and, as you do so, let it become slower and deeper. You will find yourself dropping into a quiet, relaxed, calm state. In this state the animals that are nearby will feel safe around you, and can even be drawn to you with curiosity.

Once you feel relaxed, begin by sending energy from your heart – feelings of love or appreciation – to everything that is around you. Send it to the individual things one at a time, or to everything all at once. How you do this is up to you. As you send these feelings of appreciation, notice if you feel a response coming back to you from nature. We all thrive under loving attention, and nature is no different. Enjoy radiating this loving energy for as long as you choose.

Now look around, gazing with a soft focus. Notice what you can see. What plants are in this place? What trees are nearby? Instead of naming them, simply notice their shape, colour and size. How many varieties can you see? How many different shades of green are there?

What birds can you hear? Can you see any of them? You may need to use your peripheral vision rather than looking directly at them. This lets them feel safer – being stared at can feel like ‘hunting’ energy to them. You are more likely to see them behaving naturally this way.

What insects or animals are using this place? Are any insects crawling through the grass or sand or mud beneath you? Is there evidence of any animals that have passed through this place? Do all of this from your sitting place.

End by thanking everything that is there for sharing this place with you.

When you have finished, take 30 seconds to make a few notes or sketch something that captures the key elements of your Sit Spot time.

Shorter option: Meditate in nature for 20 minutes.

Take your meditation practice outside. If you don’t already meditate, start one now and do it outdoors.

Once you have found your Sit Spot, instead of sitting with your eyes closed, sit with a soft focus and gaze gently on the things near you. Allow your thoughts to simply drift across your mind like clouds moving across the sky – noticing them but not engaging with them. Focus on slowing your breath taking longer and deeper breaths, and feel yourself becoming more and more relaxed. This will also help to quieten the mind.

Begin by sending heart energy – love or appreciation – to everything around you. Sit in your meditative state, radiating love and appreciation to all that surrounds you.

As you continue to sit you might notice the feel of the sun or the wind on your skin; the sounds of the birds, insects and other animals; the smell of the earth, plants and trees. Simply sit, quietly, with a soft gaze, noticing whatever catches your attention.

End by thanking everything that is there for sharing this place with you.

When you have finished, take 30 seconds to make a few notes or sketch something that captures the key elements of your Sit Spot time.

Only got ten minutes? Have breakfast outside.

person holding cup of coffee with saucer — Photo by Engin Akyurt on Pexels.com

Find a spot in the garden, on the balcony or just sitting by the window, and eat your breakfast mindfully. As you savour each mouthful, listen to the sounds of the birds nearby, or the wind in the trees. Feel the wind or the sun on your skin.

When you have finished eating, sit for a moment with a soft focus and gaze around you. As you look around try sending feelings of gratitude to the plants, the trees, the animals, birds and insects. Do this for a couple of minutes.

End by thanking everything that is there for sharing this place with you.

When you have finished, take 30 seconds to make a few notes or sketch something that captures the key elements of your Sit Spot time.

Make your experience richer by sharing it

You can use Sit Spot time as often as you wish during the Get Out Into Nature challenge. You could also make it a regular practice in your life, once a week or even daily.

Please share your experience on the Facebook page. When we share our experience it benefits us in several ways. It helps to reinforce the experience in our memory by revisiting it. Also when we all share together it weaves a rich tapestry of experiences that we can all enjoy.

GET OUT INTO NATURE

June 17, 2022October 23, 2023 Jacqueline Buckingham

I want to take a moment to talk about the importance of making time to get out into nature. I’m talking about unstructured time – being there quietly and consciously, without any other distractions. I also want to share with you my ‘hack’ for scheduling this time into my calendar. And to look at what we can do when we are there – other than simply going for a walk.

There is more and more evidence to prove that nature supports our emotional and mental wellbeing. Forest bathing, which began in Japan, has quickly spread across the world and become a widely acknowledged remedy for many mental and emotional conditions. We all know how great we feel when we get out into nature. Yet it can be so easy to let it slide. To think of it as something that is simply ‘nice to do’, rather than something that is vital for our sanity!

Many of us have dogs and they gift us with a reason to get out into nature. Every day, twice a day. But the dog walk can be reduced to simply trudging the streets, not setting foot on the earth. We might take the dog to a local park or woods, but when we take the same route every day we often stop noticing our surroundings.

The great pleasure of scheduling unstructured nature time into our lives is that we can choose a new path. Discover new places. Find places we never knew existed. Maybe leave your watch and phone behind and just wander.

Making time for ‘nature connection’

close up of woman wearing an engagement ring and touching a flower — Photo by Luis Zambrano on Pexels.com

I was recently co-facilitating an outdoor course. When I wasn’t teaching, I was able to become a participant. My co-facilitator began by sending us out for ‘Sit Spot’ time – time to sit and ‘be’ quietly in nature. I found a place on the edge of a lake overlooking the water and the forest beyond. We had been asked to focus on the bird songs and to ‘map’ the birds. Noticing the different types of bird song, and tracking which direction the sounds came from. Noticing how far or close they were.

We sat for about 40 minutes, and I dropped into a peaceful space that stayed with me for the rest of the day and into the following week. It was so simple and yet so powerful.

The experience reminded me of the importance of unstructured nature time. I decided to schedule a day once a month to go out into nature and just wander. I needed to treat this day as non-negotiable. This Wandering Day had to be prioritised or it would simply just slip again. It had to be a ‘big rock’ in my busy calendar.

I realise that prioritising something like nature time can feel like a luxury rather than something essential. Life is so busy. We are dealing with a lot of challenges and there is a lot to do.

However I strongly believe that as things get busier and as life become more stressful, it vital that we balance that busyness with things that nourish us and keep us sane. Things that calm us and quieten our busy minds. That help to bring the stress levels down. Dance, yoga, meditation and nature time are all tonic for the soul.

Wandering and Curiosity

back view of a backpacker walking on a grass field — Photo by Oriol Segon Torra on Pexels.com

My first Wandering Day arrived. I packed my backpack with food, water, notebook, pen and binoculars. I looked for a nature reserve with a lot of trees (it was due to be hot!) and headed out.

It was the most delicious, delightful and healing day I have had in a long time. I chose a track that would take two hours to walk. In the end I walked for three hours and only covered about a quarter of the two-hour circuit! There was so much to look at and wonder about.

A colony of ants busily scurrying to and fro across the footpath. What are they doing? Where are they going? Why aren’t any of them carrying anything in either direction? A pair of squirrels in a nearby tree. Are they mother and baby? Why is the mother just lying on a branch while the baby scurries up and down the trunk? Is she letting it explore and learn about its environment? A muddy pond, not much more than a puddle, full of mayflies mating and laying eggs. Why are they linked together like that? How does their reproductive process work? Which is the male and which is the female?

Jon Young, one of my mentors, talks about ‘cultivating curiosity’. He suggests that instead of looking at something in nature, naming it and moving on, we can become curious about it. By asking questions our relationship to that animal, insect or bird, comes alive! Why is that bird behaving that way? Who lives in that tree? Why is this dragonfly moving to and fro like that? Cultivating curiosity also encourages us to get into our child-like enquiring mind, which is humbling, playful and also deeply connecting.

Nature Connection and Animal Communication

person holding gray and white tabby cat — Photo by RDNE Stock project on Pexels.com

When it comes to animal communication, spending unstructured time in nature – ‘nature connection’ – supports and deepens our practice. It creates the foundation for connection. Beginning with connecting with nature and Mother Earth, we can then consciously connect with the animals, birds and insects. Once we are in connection, communication becomes much easier.

For this reason my courses always include ‘Sit Spot’ time. Using all of our senses to fully experience what is around us helps us become more deeply immersed in our surroundings. Nature connection is considered to be one of the origins of animal communication. Sit Spot time connects us with those foundations. It also provides us with much needed integration time during the course – a welcome moment to pause and reflect.

If you are interested in learning animal communication I am offering several beginners courses online this year. You can find details of these, as well as the booking links, on my workshops page.

I look forward to sharing many magical nature moments with you.

Jacqueline

The Art of Subtle Activism

March 30, 2022 Jacqueline Buckingham

Subtle activism is the action of consciously connecting with people, places, animals, events and sending them loving energy. It is an active engagement that works on the subtle level. Hence the name, subtle activism. This practice has been shown to have an impact upon the recipients of this loving energy.

There are several peer-reviewed studies that have shown that when groups of meditators sit together regularly there is a measurable effect upon rates of violent crime in those places. It is thought that the field of consciousness that is achieved by these groups of meditators influences the consciousness of those around them.

If we apply this to telepathic communication, we can see that when we extend this field of loving kindness to those who are not physically close to us, they can also feel the benefit of this connection.

How does subtle activism work?

At a micro-level a friend of mine who has spent a lot of time in hospital in the last year starting to connect with her cat telepathically every evening. She imagined playing with the cat and stroking it, just as she would if she were with it physically. The neighbour that fed the cat remarked upon the change in the cat’s demeanour – from skittish and jumpy to relaxed and friendly. He was unaware of what my friend was doing, he just saw the difference.

At a macro-level we can also send feelings of loving care and support telepathically to a group of animals, or all of the animals in a specific area. They will pick it up and feel soothed by it.

It is a wonderful thing to practise. Even when we cannot do anything physically, there is always something that we can do energetically or telepathically.

How to practise subtle activism

To practise subtle activism you may want to find yourself a quiet and comfortable place to sit. Somewhere that you will be free from distractions and potential interruptions.

Simple close your eyes and watch your breathing for a while. Watch it move in and out of your lungs; as you do so you may notice that your breaths become longer and deeper and your mind begins to quieten.

When you feel calm and relaxed, bring into your awareness the place or animals that you would like to connect with. Imagine your heart sending out a beam of white light that envelopes that area, or those animals. The light could be rose pink, green, violet or any colour that you choose.

Now imagine radiating love across that beam of light to the animals or place or situation.

You could say supportive and affirming phrases silently in your mind such as: I see you and send you love / my heart is filled with compassion for you / I am sorry that this is happening to you / I care deeply about what happens to you.”

Continue to sit and radiate loving energy. You could expand the words that you use into longer sentences. But ensure that those sentences are consoling, reassuring and supportive.

When you feel ready imagine drawing the beam of light back into your heart, until you feel that your energy is once more contained within your own energy field.

Something to be aware of:

It is important that we do not bring a sense of pity to the animals or the situation. That can have the opposite effect than we intend. Have you ever experienced a time when you were struggling with life and someone pitied you? It can feel disempowering rather than supportive, and the same is true for the animals. We don’t want the animals to feel like victims. That is not how they feel about themselves, they are simply having an experience. Instead of pity, bring compassion and empathy to their situation.

Some of the ways that we can apply subtle activism

There are many ways that we can use animal communication to support animals in times of distress. We can also use subtle activism at these times. You can read more about these in my blog – Floods, fires and how animal communication can help .

CONNECT WITH NATURE BEINGS

December 2, 2021 Jacqueline Buckingham

Nature connection as a child

Growing up on a farm I felt a deep connection with Nature, including the not-so-visible world of nature beings. As a child I imagined that world to be inhabited by fairies, gnomes, pixies & elves.

I have vivid memories of searching the woods for fairies as a five-year old. There was plenty of evidence of them in the fairy rings that I found. Fairy rings are small circles of mushrooms or bright green grass. How I wished that I could catch them gathering in those circles, chatting or dancing.

The roots of the trees were similarly appealing. Filled with interestingly-shaped holes that surely held the doorway to the house of a family of gnomes. If only I could make myself small enough, I could crawl in and say hello to them. Sadly I never actually saw any of these magical beings, but their presence felt very real to me.

Learning from the aborigines

As an adult I left that world behind and focussed instead on the ‘real’ world. The world that I could see and touch. However, my life eventually took me full circle to connecting with a world that is not visible to us.

This began in while I was in Australia where I spent time with aboriginal people. A naturally nomadic people, they traditionally travelled great distances using ‘songlines’ to navigate their way. They tell us that songlines are invisible lines of energy that travel criss cross the landscape. Even where there are no physically discernable features to guide them, aborigines can find their way by following these songlines. I have been with aboriginal elders as they travelled many hours across a barren desert landscape. I observed them following these songlines and they went directly to the place they were intending to go. That’s when I felt that sense of magic and mystery being reawakened in me.

Consciously working with nature

Years passed and I moved to the Findhorn community. One of their guiding principles is “co-creation with the intelligence of nature”. They connect with aspects of nature when gardening or building, or undertaking any activity that could impact the natural world.

As well as connecting with the plants themselves they connect with the ‘over-lighting deva’ of the plants. These ‘devas’ were first contacted by Findhorn community founder Dorothy Maclean. Dorothy realised that every plant species (and every species on earth) has one of these devas. The deva is responsible for the wellbeing of that species. She also taught that we can connect with the devas whenever we want to work with that species; and that when we do connect, it greatly improves the results of our work.

In fact Dorothy was frequently told that these devic beings are patiently waiting for us to connect with them. They don’t force themselves upon us or interfere with what we do. But as soon as we make contact with them they are ready to collaborate with us!

Step-by-step process to connect with Nature Beings:

Intrigued? Follow these steps so YOU can connect with these subtle aspects of nature. Begin by sitting quietly. If you’d like to connect with a deva of a particular plant you could sit near that plant. Or simply imagine it in your mind’s eye. If you want to connect with some aspect of nature at the bottom of your garden, sit there!

close your eyes or gaze with a soft focus at the plant or place you want to connect with
relax and quieten your mind by following your breath in and out for about 30 seconds
focus on your heart / heart chakra and send loving feelings to the place or plant
using your thoughts introduce yourself and let them know why you are communicating (“Hi, I’m Jane and I would like to be able to take really good care of these plants. I’m respectfully asking you to help me to do that” or “Hello, I’m Jill, I am the custodian of this piece of land and I would love to know who else lives here”)
after you have asked the question release that from your mind and focus on your heart area
notice if you can sense anything coming back to you from the plant or the place. You might feel vibrations, or see colours or shapes, you may ‘hear’ words or see images.
you can then either simply enjoy these sensations, or you could ask a question
once you feel that you have finished, please remember to give thanks for the other connecting with you. (Please do this even if you didn’t feel that you got a connection. Gratitude reinforces the things that we want to draw into our lives, and saying ‘thank you’ now will help the connection to be stronger next time.)

Notes:

I hope that you enjoy playing with this process, and I would love to know how you get on with it. Especially I would love to hear if you see anything!

Thank you for your love for nature and your desire to connect. I feel that humans, as a species, are becoming more and more disconnected from nature. It feels more important than ever that those of us who love nature and animals, do connect regularly with this vital aspect of nature. This is a key aspect of creating a world that is connected, collaborative and respectful of the natural world. After all, we need nature for our own survival!

If you’d like to hear about my future workshops, including one on this topic, please sign up for my newsletter where you will receive monthly blogs, new and updates.

HOW TO SEND TELEPATHIC MESSAGES

September 26, 2021 Jacqueline Buckingham

The word ‘telepathy’ has two parts: ‘tele’ meaning ‘distance’, and ‘pathy’ from ‘pathos’ the Greek word for feeling. Telepathy literally means ‘feeling over distance’. This is a clue to how we can make sure we are successful in our communication with animals. When we learn telepathic animal communication we are learning to communicate with them in their own language.

All animal lovers know that animals are expert at picking up on our feelings. If we feel sad, they will comfort us. If we are angry or stressed, they give us space or avoid us altogether. We can’t hide our feelings from animals and if our words are not aligned with our feelings, our animal friends will know. So it is important that our words match up with what we are saying, and also that we are not flooded with emotion when we want to communicate with our animal friend.

Here are some simple steps that you can take that will help you to get your message across clearly and effectively:

Be calm and clear
Connect with your animal from your heart
Focus on one thing at a time
Use images
Use feelings
Express yourself in the positive

To expand on each of these.

1. Be Calm and Clear: slow down and centre yourself before communicating with your animal. You could try meditating or listening to relaxing music. Being calm and clear ensures that you are not coming to the conversation with a lot of your own emotions, which could confuse them.

2. Connect from the Heart: visualise a connection from your heart centre to your animal’s heart centre (the centre of their chest, or the heart chakra area). Then send them feelings of love and appreciation. This will establish the connection and will build understanding and trust between you. It will also get their attention!

3. Focus on One Thing at a Time: keep the communication nice and simple and communicate one thought at a time. Find the simplest way to tell them that. Give them a moment or two to receive it, and then communicate the next piece.

4. Add Images: reinforcing your words with images and feelings is one of the most effective ways we can be sure our message is getting across. When you speak the words (either out loud or silently in your mind) you can also show them an image of what you are communicating.

Example: If you want them to stop bringing mice into the house, show them what you would like – for example show them leaving it outside the back door.

5. Add Feelings: Because animals pick up emotions so easily, they are highly motivated by positive feelings. If you share a feeling to go with the image that you sent them, it will motivate them to do what you have asked. Example: send them a feeling of how happy you will be if they do the thing you are asking them to do.

6. Express Yourself in the Positive: this is especially important if you want to elicit a change in behaviour. Tell them ‘do this’ instead of ‘don’t do that’. When we say ‘don’t jump up’ they only hear ‘jump up’, the ‘don’t’ gets lost. Instead say ‘keep all four paws on the ground’.

Remember to close the conversation – this is simple good manners. We wouldn’t walk away from a conversation with a person without bringing it to a close, so do the same thing for our animal friends. You could end the conversation by thanking them – it acknowledges them for listening to us, and also lets them know that the conversation is at an end.

Try working with one of these steps at a time for a few days or a week, and see how your confidence in your own intuition increases.

It is important to remember that when we are communicating in order to change a behaviour, using this technique will not guarantee that your animal will do what you want just because you’ve shown them and told them what you want. They are individuals with their own free will. However it will yield more positive behaviours than yelling, threatening, or feeling helpless – all understandable responses when we feel exasperated!

Also, if you follow these steps and take your time, you will find that it will create deeper intimacy and understanding between you and your animal.

My introductory level trainings will give you the ability to ask questions clearly in a way that the animal understands. You will also learn to understand the animal’s responses. Details and dates of upcoming trainings are in the Workshops section.

INTRODUCING A NEW PET INTO THE HOME

July 8, 2021 Jacqueline Buckingham

A sweet kitten like this can touch our heart and draw out our nurturing instincts. In these moments we can easily find ourselves wanting to welcome a new kitten (or cat) into our home. However, the animals already living with us may not be so enthusiastic.

How can we introduce a new member of the family in a way that is easy and harmonious for everybody. Human and animal?

Recently I have had several requests to help out with new cats or kittens coming into the home. There is much we can do to make the process a joyous one. I want to share with you the experiences of the animals themselves, as they have expressed them to me. I have found that there is an essential ‘truth’ to their experience when they need to adjust to a new member of the family.

The easiest way to ensure a harmonious journey is to involve your current animal family members in the process, right from the start.

1. Begin by finding out how they feel about the idea in principle

The ideal time to start involving them is when you first have the idea of getting a new cat. The perfect place to start is to ask them how they feel about a new animal coming to live with you. Don’t give them the impression that they have the ultimate say in whether this happens or not! Instead, ask them in a way that draws out their feelings, rather than asking their permission.

If you get the impression that they are happy about the idea, then great! Now you can let them know more about your plans. Let them know which animal you are considering and the time scale for them to arrive.

Franz’s story: I was asked to speak to Franz, a very adventurous cat who lived alone with his person. Franz and his person were very close and had a lot of adventures together, but his person felt that he would benefit from cat-company, especially as she worked irregular hours. She didn’t like him being alone so much.

2. Share more about your plans

If you feel that they are reluctant, you could try being more specific. They may say ‘no’ to the general idea, but can have a different response if you are more specific. Try asking them how they feel about a particular species, breed, gender or age of animal. As you offer the different options, see if you can pick up on their feeling response to those.

Franz’s person was considering getting two kittens – a brother and sister. When I asked how he felt about this, he wasn’t keen on the idea of two. He said it felt like two against one. However he said was open to the idea of just one new kitten. I then saw an image of Franz ‘mentoring’ a male kitten and sharing his favourite places to explore. It felt like something Franz would really enjoy. This helped his person to make a decision, knowing that it was one that Franz was happy with. After giving the idea some more thought she decided to get only the male kitten.

3. Tell them the time scale

Once you have decided upon which animal will be coming into the home and when, it helps the existing residents to know when to expect them to arrive. They don’t understand calendar time, so let them know in terms of how many days (‘sleeps’) until the new resident arrives.

4. Find out how they’d prefer to meet the new arrival

Ask how they would like to be introduced to the new cat/kitten – immediately or in a phased way. You cannot predict what they may say here! This will be very specific to each of the current residents. Some have told me that they would like their person to hold the new arrival while they look at them and smell them. Others have said they would like the new arrival to be kept out of their way until they are ready to meet them. Often they will express a need to be reassured that their person won’t forget about them and shower all their affection onto the new animal.

In Franz’s case I told him the date that the new kitten would arrive. I also told him that the kitten would initially be kept in a separate part of the house as he got used to his new home. He also wanted to be reassured that he would still get one-on-one time with his person.

5. Ask if there is anything else they need to make the process go smoothly

You might find that your current resident is happy for the new arrival to simply arrive and immediately become part of their routine. Alternatively, they may have a preference for how the new cat comes into the home. This can happen where the existing cat is concerned about being ‘usurped’ by the new arrival.

Simply acknowledge their concerns, listen to their requests, and then do what you can to accommodate them. Do make sure you do what is realistic. Again it is important that you don’t allow the existing cat to set the rules. But do your best to meet their needs in a way that respects their concerns, while remaining realistic and grounded. There is no point starting a new routine that a) makes the existing cat into a diva, and b) that cannot be maintained!

In Franz’s case his person decided to let the new kitten have some time adjusting to his new home. She fed them in separate parts of the house for a few weeks. Over time she gradually introduced them to one another, by opening the dividing door a tiny crack. Every so often the door would be opened a bit wider and wider, until eventually they were feeding alongside one another with just a wire gate between them.

When the time came for them to be fully integrated, roaming the house freely together, it happened quickly and smoothly.

6. Make adjustments and changes as needed

If you find that unexpected dissension or undesired interaction between the animals occurs. If so, ask again what each of them needs.

You may find at this point that you need to talk to them about their behaviour: explaining how it is affecting the other animal (and you!), and asking them to change it. Do this by expressing the desired behaviour in the positive (eg instead of saying “don’t scratch”, say “pat them with your closed paw” – removing the word ‘don’t’).

Like all kittens, the new kitten was very energetic and rambunctious. Franz wasn’t overly impressed with this behaviour. When I checked in with him about this, he told me that it wasn’t what he had expected. He had been looking forward to a teenager that he could go on adventures with; not an annoying over-enthusiastic kitten!

I communicated with the kitten and asked him to keep his distance from Franz. I reassured him that Franz likes him (which he did) and I explained that older cats prefer to be slower and quieter. This helped the kitten to understand Franz’s needs and his reaction to the kitten’s attempts to play. The kitten changed immediately and quietened down when he was around Franz. Now the two of them go on adventures together, with Franz quietly ‘supervising’ the climbing adventures of the kitten.

7. Finally, try to share your love equally between your new family members

As with children, we may have a secret favourite! But the best way to a happy and harmonious household is for everyone to feel equally important in your affections. Your existing animals will be able to adapt to having less time with you, as long as they feel just as loved by you as they always were.

You can use these steps for the introduction of any new animal into your home. It will work just as well for dogs, birds, rabbits. The idea is to involve the other animals in the process, give them as much information as possible. This helps them understand what is happening and to prepare for it. Much easier than having to adapt to a sudden unexpected change!

I’d love to hear your experiences in this area. Please also ask any questions in the comments section.

WHY ANIMALS CAN BE FEARFUL

April 20, 2021 Jacqueline Buckingham

A question that I am often asked about animal behaviour is: “If animals focus only on the present moment why do they exhibit fearful or traumatic behaviour? Surely that shows that they hold on to memories from the past.” I thought I’d put my thoughts on this topic into a blog:

I have heard that animals are much more ‘in the moment’ and can shake off their worries and fears. Is this true?

Animals that live in the wild, or close to their wild nature, do live in the present moment. An animal’s natural way of living is to respond and react to their present circumstances and current environment. This is different from humans. We are often thinking about the past or dreaming about the future!

When an animal experiences threat or danger they will exhibit a ‘fight, flight, freeze’ response. But as soon as the danger or threat has passed they will shake their body to release the experience. This releases the tension held in their muscles; they return to what they were doing before the danger or threat appeared.

In this way, the animal literally ‘shakes off’ the experience instead of storing it in their body’s cellular memory.

But isn’t there evidence that animals hold onto trauma just as people do?

Animals that live with humans or that have a lot of interaction with humans can hold onto trauma. They learn from experience, just as humans do.

Learning from experience is useful if we want to train a dog to round up sheep or a horse to jump fences. However animals also remember past experiences of danger, threat and pain.

If an animal has that experience many times they will learn to be afraid of anything that reminds them of that experience.

I know that horses can be scared of whips. Surely they are not fully in the moment if they remember treatment from the past that causes them to be scared now.

Being scared of whips does not mean that they are no longer in the present moment. It simply means that their sympathetic nervous system has been ‘programmed’ to respond to a whip. The sympathetic nervous system prepares the body for the “fight or flight” response during any potential danger.

If the horse regularly and frequently experiences pain from a whip, their sympathetic nervous system learns that a whip equals pain. Eventually the horse’s response is no longer a conscious reaction, but a basic survival mechanism. Their sympathetic nervous system is now protecting them from that potential pain by triggering a ‘fight or flight’ response whenever they see a whip.

I have a rescue dog. It is a delightful dog and is totally relaxed with everyone. But if anyone wearing a hat gets close to them they get aggressive. Why is that? A hat can’t hurt them.

This is very similar to the situation with the horse and a whip. It might be that your dog was previously hit or kicked by someone wearing a hat. Over time it will not only equate the person with the experience. It will equate the hat with the person.

If this continues for a prolonged time, eventually anybody in a hat will remind them of the danger and pain. Now they respond in a defensive and protective way to anybody in a hat. Their way of protecting themselves from danger looks like aggression to us.

Do wild animals learn to be afraid of humans or are they naturally afraid?

Wild animals don’t have these learned fears. They have not learned to be afraid of a whip or a person wearing a hat. This is because they have not had the experience that teaches them to be scared of these things. But they do have that natural fight / flight / freeze response to threat or danger.

Wild animals also have an instinctual response to the energy of aggression coming towards them. That is why a wild animal will run away when we raise a rifle or a camera. Both of these actions contain an energy of ‘hunting’.

The animal does not know if the person intends to take a photograph or take their life. They just feel threatened by the energy being directed towards them. They don’t hang around to find out what it is – they just run!

Is it true that animals can pick up on our feelings? If so, can we influence how they feel?

The animals that live with us are so connected to us that they continually pick up our emotions. As a result we can influence how they feel. They can learn that certain situations or people should be feared based upon our response.

This is a throwback to their time living in their wild state in packs or herds. One of the herd picks up the scent of danger. Very quickly the whole herd gets the message and they are all on high alert.

We are their new ‘herd’ and they look to us for clues as to how they should respond to a situation.

Can our thoughts and ideas help our furry friends change their behaviour?

Absolutely! Our animal companions pick up our thoughts as well as our emotions and they look to us for guidance. If we are worried that they will bark and growl at other dogs they meet while out on a walk, we can inadvertently reinforce their behaviour.

They hear us thinking “I hope he doesn’t growl at the dog that is approaching us”. The trouble is they don’t hear the negative part, “I hope he doesn’t”. They just hear “growl at the other dog” – so they do!

They love us and they want to please us.

If we want them to change their behaviour we can help by focussing our mind on the behaviour we would like them to exhibit. We can think, “I am so happy that my dog walks calmly past other dogs”. Our dog will pick up that message and they will do that instead.

If you have a question or a topic that you would like me to write about, please email me via the contact form.

Image: Cath Neville – unsplash

Working with Behavioural Issues

July 15, 2020 Jacqueline Buckingham

How to work with an animal’s natural behaviour for a more effective result.

My stepfather likes to feed the birds in his garden. He puts out several bird feeders, sits on the lounge and watches them through the window. At 88 it is one of his great pleasures in life. However, whenever an ‘opportunistic’ squirrel appears he leaps up from his chair and bangs on the window to scare them away.

“Blooming squirrels” he said to me, “can’t you talk to them and tell them to stop eating the bird food?”

That is a great question! Yes, of course I could ask them. But my request for them to leave the bird food alone would be unlikely to yield a result. The squirrels are just doing what squirrels do naturally. Searching for food, especially nuts and seeds, and taking it back to their drey or burying it for winter.

I share this story with you because whenever we want to speak to an animal about its behaviour and especially when we hope to work with them to change that behaviour, we will have very little success if we are asking them to do something that goes against their natural instincts or their natural behaviour.

If we want a dog to stop barking or a cat to stop hunting we need to be collaborative with them in order to elicit a positive change. Dogs bark. Cats hunt. Once we recognise that they are only doing what comes naturally to them – what would have been their natural behaviour when they were still living wild – we can begin to work with this natural behaviour instead of trying to shut it down altogether.

So how do we work with them when we want them to change a behaviour that is causing distress, or negatively affecting the other beings that live with them or share their environment? There are a couple of places that we can begin.

The first is to look for a COMPROMISE. Begin by suggesting an alternative behaviour that still respects their natural instinct and is not asking them to stop being a dog, or a cat, or a squirrel!

If your dog barks every time someone comes to the door or walks down the street, you could ask that instead of barking many times, they only bark once. This request will need to be reinforced by some positive affirmation on your part – letting them know that you heard that bark, that they did well to alert you and that you are grateful for that bark, and then reminding them that they can stop now.

Similarly if your cat is a hunter and you are not too happy with what they are catching, you can ask them to leave baby animals alone – birds, rabbits or mice. Again acknowledging them for what a great hunter they are so that they feel affirmed and not ‘made wrong’. This will provide them with what they need, while you get something closer to what you want.

Another tool available to us is NEGOTIATION. Offering an alternative solution that still meets the animal’s needs while encouraging behaviour that causes less distress or has less impact on the animals and humans that share their environment.

In the case of the squirrels, I suggested to my stepfather that he might set up a squirrel feeder in the opposite corner of the garden, creating a negotiation opportunity. I could then to ask them to use that feeder and leave the bird food alone. “I’m not feeding the squirrels as well!” he exclaimed, putting an end to that particular idea!

If you are dealing with rodents or ants that are coming into the house, you could suggest an alternative place for them to be – perhaps outside in the garden, somewhere that they will still have shelter, warmth and food – and ask if they are willing to go along with that alternative. A friend of mine did this with great success with an infestation of ants in her kitchen – she explained to them that she couldn’t share her kitchen with them, and that they needed to move outside. She promised to provide them with food (sugar and water) on a regular basis, and the ants left.

Working with behavioural issues is a huge topic, and is probably going to be the one area that you are asked for help with more than any other. These simple ideas of remembering that the animal will always act true to its nature, and to work with it rather than against it, will help produce more successful results every time.

If you are interested in working in more specifically with animal behaviour, Jacqueline offers regular Mentoring Sessions exploring some of the topics covered in the Introductory trainings, including a session on Behavioural Issues. There will also be new ‘masterclass’ one-day online classes, one of which will focus entirely on Behavioural Issues. If you are interested in these, please contact Jacqueline direct.

The Importance of Being Relaxed

May 29, 2020 Jacqueline Buckingham

Being mentally, emotionally and physically relaxed is a vital aspect of successful interspecies communication. Our busy energy bodies (mental, physical and emotional) can push an animal away, or muddy the communication. This is true for wild animals, and is also true for our companion animals.

We can support our development of our interspecies communication skills by beginning to recognise when our thoughts, our physical energy or our emotions are over-active, and by having practical ways of bringing ourselves back to a relaxed calm state. It is when we are relaxed, calm and peaceful mentally, emotionally and physically that telepathic communication is most successful.

WHEN OUR EMOTIONS are running high, the animals will pick up those emotions, and they will either avoid us, or they will react to the emotion, or they will reflect it the emotion back to us by ‘mirroring’ our behaviour.

Our goal of being emotionally peaceful when we communicate ensures that our own emotional landscape is not colouring the communication. Also, the more familiar we are with our own emotions, the more easily we can differentiate between what is our own emotion and what is the animal’s.

How we go about calming our emotions is a deeply personal thing. We may need to find support to help us process our emotional reaction to an animal’s situation; or we may simply need to take ourselves ‘offline’ for a while until our emotions feel more balanced and equanimous. Become familiar with your own emotional landscape; what triggers a response; what helps to bring you back to calmness.

If you want to know how well you are doing at being emotionally peaceful, go and visit a horse! They are very sensitive to human emotions. If they move away from you, there is still some work to be done; if they stay near or move closer to you… well done! You’re on the right track!

OUR THOUGHTS also need to be relaxed and quiet When we are overthinking, or if our mind is full of ‘to do’ lists, or running over the conversations we had earlier in the day (or earlier in the week) we are clearly stuck in our head. There is no capacity for us to drop into our heart and listen.

Telepathic communication happens heart-to-heart (‘telepathy’ means ‘feeling with’). In order to be successful at telepathic communication we need to be able to move out of our head, away from our thoughts, and drop into our heart space. When we are overthinking we are not connected. On the flip side: the less we think, the more connected we become.

You might like to find a practice that helps your mind to become still, such as a regular meditation practice, regular ‘sit spot’ time in nature, or practise Qi Gong or Tai Chi. These are all excellent activities to help move energy away from our head and into our body and our heart.

Here is a breathing meditation that can help to quieten the mind, and which may also being a sense of emotional calmness:

Close your eyes and turn your attention to your breath. As you breathe in, visualise the air moving into your lungs, filling them with life-giving oxygen. As you breathe out, see the air moving out of your lungs giving carbon dioxide to the trees. Do this three or four times.

Now begin to notice how each breath becomes slower, deeper, longer. As this happens, notice how your body relaxes and your mind becomes still.

Now breathe in for a count of three; pause and hold your breath for a count of three; then breathe out for a count of six. Do this for one minute (you can set a timer on your phone so that your focus is on the exercise and not on keeping track of time). Each day increase the length of time that you practice this breathing activity by one minute, so that by the end of the week you are practising it for seven minutes.

Any time you want to quieten your mind you can return to this breathing practice. When we ‘watch’ the breath moving in and out of our lungs it distracts our mind, giving it something else to focus on, so that it can take a break from those persistent thoughts. It is also a really great exercise to help you to fall asleep when busy thoughts are keeping you awake at night.

FINALLY, WE NEED TO BE PHYSICALLY RELAXED before we begin telepathic communication. If we are fidgety and restless we will be distracted; it can also make the animal feel on edge. Become familiar with your body’s need for physical activity and especially what helps to release it. If you are about to sit down to communicate and yet you feel full of unspent energy, find some way to discharge that energy before you start the communication. Dancing wildly around the kitchen, running laps in the backyard, or doing 30 minutes of strong yoga – whatever you choose, have something in your ‘toolkit’ that you can call upon whenever you need to release your physical energy.

WHEN WE ARE AWARE of these three forms of energy that are constantly moving in and through us and become familiar with how they express themselves within us, we start to recognise when they are out of balance. At the same time we can build our capacity for quietening that energy through identifying resources that help us. Over time we will find that we can quickly drop into a quiet, calm, relaxed state of being with very little effort – the perfect state for clear two-way communication.

May 2020

Here are some more ideas for relaxation: Meditation – Walking in Nature – Tai Chi – Qi Gong – Yoga – Painting – Drawing – Listening to Music – Pranayama (breath work) – Gardening – Jigsaw Puzzles – Colouring-in Books – Tapping (EFT)

Floods and fires and how Animal Communication can help

December 24, 2019 Jacqueline Buckingham

As a dual national of the UK and Australia, I am struck by the extreme weather conditions being experienced on both sides of the planet right now. As I write this I am in Australia where weeks and weeks of torrential rain have lashed the east coast – sometimes upwards of 110mm in two hours. The land is so water-logged that there is nowhere else for the rain to go other than run over the surface causing mudslides. The drains are full and the even when the flood waters recede it feels like a temporary respite before more rains come and threaten to overspill the dam and levee walls again.

At the same time one of my friends in the USA has had to evacuate her home because of approaching fires. There is no doubt that the climate is changing and we are seeing more and more of these extreme weather events.

The last time I wrote about this topic was in late-2019. The UK was beset with floods and Australia was in the grip of the worst bushfires for decades; they were then, ironically, praying for rain. America had still more wild fires.

Whether we are dealing with rain, fire, flood or drought, the animals are suffering alongside us. We have seen heartbreaking images of animals doggie-paddling through floodwaters desperately seeking dry land, of koalas burned or suffering from smoke inhalation. Then there are all those creatures who don’t make the news – birds, insects, reptiles, small mammals – as well as the plants and trees; all struggling to survive these extreme conditions.

This is a vital time. There is much we can do as animal communicators to help alleviate the suffering, providing support and reassurance to those animals being affected by these extreme conditions. Whether or not we can physically be with them, telepathic animal communication allows us to help them anyway. Here are some ways in which we can help:

PREPARE THEM BEFOREHAND:

Alert wild animals to an approaching weather event. Let them know which direction to travel in order to escape without running towards another life-threatening situation. Tell burrowing animals (such as badgers, foxes and rabbits; wombats, bandicoots and bilbies) that live in low lying areas that floods are on their way so that they can relocate to an elevated site.

Inform domesticated animals that they need to be relocated due to impending fire or flood, explaining what is happening and where they will be taken. This helps them to prepare and also not to be fearful because now they understand what is happening and why. We can also let them know how long they need to be relocated for. Is this temporary until danger is out of the way, or permanent because their home is gone?

2. HELP THEM AFTERWARDS:

Find out how they are coping. If they have been injured, ask them about the extent of the injury and whether it is causing them pain. Ask them if they know what could help to alleviate the pain or to help them heal.

Let them know what will happen to them now. Explain what the humans are considering, and ask them if they are happy with that. Especially in the case of rehoming animals (wild or domesticated). We can ask them if they would like to go here or there, assuming that there are choices available. If there is no choice, tell them as it helps them to more easily relax into the only option that is available to them.

If they need to be rehomed for a while, tell them how long it will be and reassure them that they will return home after that period of time has elapsed. If plans change while they are in the relocated place, let them know as soon as possible that there has been a change of plan and give them the new information.

Our work here is to help them to understand the changes that will happen, to help them understand the reasons behind those changes, and to keep them updated, so they are able to roll with these changes as they occur. Just like people, the more information they have and the better prepared they are, the more easily they can adjust to the new, unfamiliar situation.

3. SUPPORT THEM DURING REHABILITATION:

Keep checking in with them to see how they are getting on. Is their injury healing? Is there anything else they need to be comfortable or out of pain?

How are they settling in to their new home? Remember that animals live very much in the present moment. As long as they have been given good information about why they are there and for how long, they will quite quickly adjust to their new situation. However it is good to check in with them from time to time, making sure that all is well and asking if there is anything else they need.

Give them news of their people (if they have had to be separated from them). They will be curious and will want to know that their humans are OK. This is especially important if their humans are unable to visit them regularly or at all.

4. HOSPICE THEM AT THE END OF LIFE:

When an animal is facing the end of its physical life, we can provide essential support to them at this time. Whether we are encountering wild animals that have been fatally injured by inhaling smoke or water, or those that have already passed over, we can hospice them on their way back to spirit realm.

Simply bearing witness and sending them feelings of love and appreciation, letting them know that our thoughts are with them and that we care about what happens to them, can make a big difference to the animal’s transition. [This is a witnessing process, also known as Subtle Activism, and there are other ways that Subtle Activism can help which I mention in the fifth point.]

If an animal has been identified by a human (vet or other) that it has reached the end of its ability to survive, there is a decision to be made about how that animal transitions. We can act as a go-between, asking the animal how it would like to transition. Some animals want to go quickly and are happy to be euthanised. Some are very clear about where and when they would like to be euthanised, and others clearly do not want to be euthanised, preferring to let nature take its course.

We can play a key role at these times, enabling the animal’s wishes to be taken into account and relaying those to the humans involved. However, this is also a time to tread carefully and mindfully as not all humans are ready to consider that their animal has wishes which may sometimes conflict with their own. Especially when humans are already dealing with their own trauma and grief around the situation, it can be hard for them to encompass new perspectives. It is important that we are respectful of where each person is at on their own journey of relationship with the animal realm, and that we do not force our own ideas upon them. At these times I find great comfort in Penelope Smith’s Code of Ethics for Interspecies Communicators:

“We go only where we are asked to help, so that others are receptive and we truly can help. We respect the feelings and ideas of others and work for interspecies understanding, not pitting one side against another but walking with compassion for all. We acknowledge the things that we cannot change and continue where our work can be most effective.”

5. SUBTLE ACTIVISM:

The world of Subtle Activism is one that is gaining a stronger foothold, and which can be immensely supportive for the animals as well as for us humans. Especially in those situations where we cannot be physically present and cannot do anything at a practical level, we can feel overwhelmingly powerless. With Subtle Activism at our disposal we are never powerless.

Subtle Activism is simply holding positive thoughts and feelings and sending those to the situation or animal or person who is struggling. It might be in the form of words – “I see you, I care about what is happening to you, I am sending you love, care and support”. It could be in the form of feelings of love and compassion. Or it could be a blend of both.

In the situations I have been describing here, we can send these thoughts and feelings to specific animals (wild or domestic) that we know about, or we can send them (using our intention) to all animals in a particular area. In the latter case, we don’t need to know exactly who is there, we just trust that whoever is there will pick up these energetic vibrations and that they will feel supported and strengthened by them.

I hope that this post has given you some inspiration and ideas for how to bring these precious skills into practical application to support the animals during these challenging times. It is my hope that we can all work together to help alleviate pain and reduce the suffering of animals and humans alike.

All of my workshops include a session looking at how we can work with nature and animals in this way; providing you with tools and empowering you to make a positive difference in these times. The Level Two workshops include a deeper exploration of working with the elements, nature spirits and elemental beings, and you will discover that they are waiting patiently for us to work together for greater harmony and balance in the world. Details of my 2022 workshops can be found on the Workshops page.

24 December 2019 (updated 30 March 2022)

This post is the first in a series. The next will be on the topic of Working with the Elements, Nature Spirits and Elemental Beings. How can we work together with the elements and the land to alleviate the impact of extreme weather?

In 2022 our introductory workshops will include modules on how to communicate with and support animals during natural disasters, such as these. Our follow-on workshops will include how to work with the elements, nature spirits and elemental beings. For more details on these, please check our workshops page.